Answer: Jesus and people.
Today started off pretty well. I got to the office early and felt very productive for a few hours, then I went off to a job interview. No, not an interview for a full-time job – I interviewed for a part-time admin job at my church in the youth ministry department. I talked to the director for about an hour and we had a good talk. The job would basically be what I do at the YL office, so not too much to learn. And I think I’d be good at it. I like having the freedom to be creative and use my gifts of communication. Plus, it pays well even though it’s only about 12 hours a week. It seems like it will fit in perfectly with my schedule now because the regional office is pretty flexible. It will be a bit like last year when I was working at the office and Banana Republic, but far less stressful. BR had weird hours and I just have no passion for retail. I don’t really have a strong passion for administrative things, but I am good at them and I don’t mind the tasks. It’s good for this stage of my life.
So the interview went well, but when I got back to the office I just realized that I was overwhelmed. The thought of having another job disrupts my sense of calm because it will just throw a kink in my routine. But I think I’ve gotten a little lazy and so more structure and responsibility would probably be healthy for me. I’ve also applied for some full-time jobs and wonder if I should wait and see if anything happens with those. I just left thinking, what should I do? I don’t like that unsettled feeling. Anyway, I started getting a little irritable at work and all I have to say is I’m so thankful for Elisabeth Bishop. She is one of the best people God could have put in my life. She’s our regional administrator so we work very closely together. This woman sees me at my best and worst and loves me so well. And we could not be more different. I approach life emotionally and loudly and Elisabeth prefers to sit back quietly and listen. She is lots of fun and one of the friendliest, kindest people I’ve ever met. Lately I’ve just expressed to her some frustrations I have about my job and she’s been very gracious. Usually she just listens to me because she knows I need to just let it out; and Elisabeth is the kind of person you just want to tell things to. That’s how God made her. But today she gave me some constructive advice. She said I was looking at a situation from one angle and I needed to approach it from a different one. We talked through it and some other things I could do to make it better and by the end, I felt peaceful again. It just showed me how I can be ALL emotion…pretty much all of the time. I just feel things deeply and that gets in the way of being rational and making decisions with my head. But Elisabeth works from a great balance of head and heart and I needed to hear that wisdom today. God knows what we need and He knew that my life would be richer because of Elisabeth. I can’t say enough about her. God is more real to me because I know her.
After a few hours, I left the office, ran a few errands that I had been putting off and then had coffee with another YL leader. She goes to Wake Forest and is the age of my youngest sister Charlotte (19) but seems so much older to me. Catherine and I just speak the same language and had an instant connection. We talked for two hours and it was so great. I just loved hearing her story, affirming her and praying with/for her. It made my heart so full and I left realizing that 1) we need to hang out more and 2) I love pouring into college students. They’re just so fun and so on fire. Gosh, I just remember how I was at that age, just a sponge ready to soak up anything anyone told me about Jesus. I hope I’m still that way. Being around Catherine brought me deep joy and was a great addition to the day.
THEN (okay, last thing, seriously), I came back to school and went to the “Publications Banquet.” Another tradition – are you surprised?! It’s a dinner with the whole school where yearbooks are presented and other people are honored (such as the editor of the newspaper and the like). I love being around the girls. It just puts a smile on my face to be with them and see their world. We had some laughs and enjoyed twice baked potatoes and sweet rolls (yuuummm).
And the weather was beautiful.
And I’m going to watch the Grey’s Anatomy season finale with some girls tonight in the rec room. A perfect way to end the day.
So, you can see how even when the days get frustrating or boring or emotionally draining, Jesus meets us there. He has given me so much to be thankful for and gives me little gifts to keep me going. I just want to see Him in every day. I want to look around and say, “Yup, He was there…and there…and, oh yeah, there…” I keep saying how I’m in a time of waiting and searching and discovery – which can be hard at times – but I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the ways God has met me intimately here. I’m getting to know Him now better than I ever knew Him before. I wouldn’t trade that for anything….not even the security of a full-time job or owning a house or being married or whatever else it is that other 26 year olds are doing. At the end of the day, He’s all I want and that’s the truth.